2/16/15

"Shelter me oh genius words 
Just give me strength to pen these things 
And give me peace to well her wings." 

Well, this is gorgeous:



Fifty-nine days until the Chroma 10-year anniversary tour rolls through the Steel City. It's good to have things to look forward to.

I never had the opportunity to see Cartel live in their heyday, despite thoroughly loving this record, and so I am happy to see it revived. In their new live recordings, lead vocalist Will Pugh sounds crystal clear and resonant as ever, and the swell of strings in this gentle, powerful - OK, also somewhat sappy - ballad elevate them from pop punk to a songwriter's plateau. I don't hear a one-off album closer in this recording, I hear a seasoned group of musicians playing their best at a heartfelt tune. I find it hopeful. I find it truthful. I find it confessional in a near-desperate kind of way, one that reminds a sad, sorry little heart of all its feeling potential, and of the days when giving it all in the name of love sounded as much of an adventure as any creative endeavor.

Ten years ago, when I would've played this song from a first-generation iPod in my mom's car on the way to ballet class, love was a dream that I could not attach to places or faces other than the ones that were right in front of me - was it love or convenience then, I cannot really say, but oh, how clear the difference is today, how the recognition of the weight of love balances the perspective in the most centering kind of way. When you know, you know, they say, and this I have come to understand in a way that only age and experience can provide. Time and experience change many things, including the will and capacity and resilience of the heart, and I am listening to these poetic words today with a stronger one, than I ever did ten years ago, and that is only because of the depths of love and desperation I have encountered. For this, no matter the risk, I can only be grateful and surrender.

"And I'll hold on to the dream
Of this beggar's plea and optimistic fantasy."
~The Minstrel's Prayer
Cartel, Chroma

2/15/15

So, it's easy to hate on Valentine's Day, or any celebration of any sort, really, in the name of being jaded or cynical or merely above the commercialization of it all -  but is there anything so wrong with telling someone you love them, on any day? No. What's so wrong, then, about a day exclusively devoted to that?

I guess, in the perfect relationship, such a day would be every day. 

But that's not how it goes. 

Most relationships aren't perfect. Most are fractured and complicated. So many fall apart under the weight of personalities and realities and the heavy, constant weight of expectation. The best, I think, rise above and heal the harm, like skin over scars. I think that's what this song is about. About trying through the hardest times to stay optimistic, to be hopeful, to believe. About counting down the days til the open wounds are closed.

Show me Dallas Green songs and I will show you how to wear your heart on your sleeve. His voice on this track is nothing short of stunning - an incredible, inspired performance - and his playing, solo acoustic spotlit like the rest of this brilliant little record, are captivating in a deep and feeling kind of way, one just right for lonely mornings and even better for the solitude of a cold, dark night. 

"So there goes my life
Passing by with every exit sign
It's been so long
Sometimes I wonder how I will stay strong
No sleep tonight
I'll keep on driving these dark highway lines
And as the moon fades
One more night gone, only twenty more days

But I will see you again
I will see you again a long time from now

And there goes my life
Passing by with every departing flight
And its been so hard
So much time so far apart
And she walks the night
How many hearts will die tonight
And will things have changed?
I guess I'll find out in seventeen days.

But I will see you again
I will see you again a long time from now

My body aches,
and it hurts to sing,
and no one is moving
And I wish that I weren't here tonight,
but this is my life.

And I will see you again
I will see you again a long time from now

And I will see you again
I will see you again a long time from now."

~Hello, I'm in Delaware
City and Colour, Sometimes

2/13/15

“It’s OK to cry.”  

But is it only OK if you have permission? Is it more OK if you are alone? What about at a desk, at work, choking them back so notices and it's like you never really cried at all, is that OK? Is it more OK if the reason is for someone else and maybe, for once, not yourself? Or are they always for you?

Tears are the strangest, most versatile of physical reactions. Sometimes they are happy, more often, they are not. Sometimes they're hot and salty with fury, sometimes they are thin and wet, cold and numb. Some arrive unannounced and uninvited and interrupt the party. Others are like that old friend you haven't seen in years, making you feel safe and comforted and at home. You could cry about anything, if you look around enough, or you could cry about nothing, if you were melodramatic enough, but you can also cry about everything and nothing all once, just because the world is bright and ever-changing and you are small and alone, which is nothing as far as the day to day of your reality is concerned, but everything, everything, everything, if you want to find balance in your place in this world, and as scary as it is, there is comfort in that.

"Don't let them see you cry
When the dam breaks down
And the city's covered in water
'Cause I believe we fly
When the moon takes shape
And I dose off, on your shoulders
And the trust you see, it's you
So breathe while you're alive
Let the big band play
As you tap leather with your fingers
And I tried to write in style
But the words just come
And I write them as soon as I see them
And I trust that you write them too
And I trust that you love me too."
~Don't Let Them See You Cry 
Manchester Orchestra, Mean Everything to Nothing

2/2/15

In nearly seven years of running this humble home for my words and thoughts related to songs, albums, artists and creativity, something happened this weekend that never before occurred.

I lost a post.

I had about 600 words on the beautiful new Punch Brothers album, and I didn't press publish, it didn't save, and I lost it. Then I lost it, or wanted to anyway, because I worked hard on that and I like sharing my thoughts, especially when I actually review something that might give someone a new recommendation or context for listening. But in spirit of "The Phosphorescent Blues," which is my favorite kind of bluegrass, part elevated folk and part chamber music, I will not dwell on what I no longer have, I will not lose a minute of this present. I'm so struck by this album's maturity, and so soothed by its shadows and shimmers, that it might prove to be the perfect accompaniment for moving onward in spite of any stumbling blocks - which is, after all, what progress is all about, isn't it?

For the sake of review, some bulletpoint thoughts:

• Chris Thile, virtuoso;
• T.Bone Burnett, wizard;
• "Familiarity," never heard a Track 1 like this before;
• Mortality, a worthy theme.

"My oh my, what a wonderful day
We're having, we're having,
Why, oh why, are we looking for a way
Outside it, outside it?

How long, oh Lord, can you keep the whole world
Spinning under our thumbs?"
~My Oh My
Punch Brothers, The Phosporescent Blues

1/28/15

How long the nights can feel when you are alone, how grey the skies can look in the morning when you feel as empty as the day before.
How suffocating the world can be, with all its petty problems and daily difficulties compounding the very real, often exhilarating, occasionally traumatic exercise of existing.
But these times are temporary ones. These struggles will pass, just as they did before, and all that's around you will look new again, tinted by love. The sweet sounds of morning birds will ring in your ears, the sparkle of sun will fill your eyes, and on that day, you will live like you never have before. That day is coming. It could even be tomorrow, if you let it.

"I heard the church bells from afar,
But we found each other in the dark.
And when the smoke does finally pass
We will rise above all the ash.

Cause we're gonna live, we're gonna live, we're gonna live
We're gonna live, we're gonna live, we're gonna live
We're gonna live, we're gonna live, we're gonna live
At last.

So bright, the flames burned in our hearts,
That we found each other in the dark.
Like beasts out in the wilderness
We are fighting to survive and convalesce.

But we're gonna live, we're gonna live, we're gonna live
We're gonna live, we're gonna live, we're gonna live
We're gonna live, we're gonna live, we're gonna live
Like the rest.

Through the black starless water,
And the cold lonely air.
On the rock restless seas,
The vessel in deep disrepair.
And I swore they started singing,
But then oh, rejoice!
I can still hear your voice.

Then I heard the church bells from afar
But we found each other in the dark."

~We Found Each Other in the Dark 

City and Colour, Little Hell